Hairendous

Can we Please speak for just a minute about one of the worst fashion atrocities of modern times...the hair piece. Now I'm not talking about the toupe, I believe the ridiculousness of head rugs has been well documented by all major media outlets. What I am most concerned with today, is the nappy curly-ques bobbypinned to the ponytails of half my fellow subway riders every morning. You pretend as if your straight, mousy-brown hair turns in to blond ringlets at the back of your head if you want to, but honey everyone knows that your curls come off with your banana clip. Now unless you are Jessica Simpson and can pay $10,000 to have real hair perfectly infused into your head, do not attempt to go from a bob cut to Rapunzel overnight. Those of us barely scraping up rent will just have to let our hair grow out the natural way. I mean take some hair vitamins or something, but for the love of God, do not try to clip hair to your head and pass it off as your own. You do not look cute, you do not look sexy, you look like trailer trash on prom night and you need to TAKE IT OFF!!! At the very least, can you please select a shade of Barbie hair even remotely close to that of your own? And not the color your hair used to be, the color it is right now.

Bottom Line: if you're having a bad hair day, phony follicles are not the answer; a baseball cap works every time.